It’s the week of the SuperBowl and Golf Channel sent out a link to a lesson Martin did with Minnesota Viking kicker Blair Walsh. Blair talks about a problem he had when practicing and Martin applies it to golf.
Go Seahawks!
Got an e-mail from my dad today that was full of golf jokes, and I thought I would pass them along. They are all old, but there might be a chuckle or two in there.
A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from a heart attack!
“Help me dear,” she groans to her husband.
The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes, picks up his putter, and lines up his putt.
His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him.
“I’m dying here and you’re putting?”
“Don’t worry dear,” says the husband calmly, “they found a doctor on the second hole and he’s coming to help you.
“Well, how long will it take for him to get here?” she asks feebly.
“No time at all,” says her husband. “Everybody’s already agreed to let him play through.”
___________________________
A gushy reporter told Phil Mickelson, “You are spectacular; your name is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around the course. What’s your secret?”
Mickelson replied, “The holes are numbered.”
___________________________
A young man and a priest are playing golf together. At a short par-3 the priest asks, “What are you going to use on this hole, my son?”
The young man says, “An 8-iron, father. How about you?”
The priest says, “I’m going to hit a soft seven and pray.”
The young man hits his 8-iron and puts the ball on the green.
The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.
The young man says, “I don’t know about you, father, but in my church, when we pray, we keep our head down.”
___________________________
Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody 3-iron standing over a lifeless man.
The detective asks, “Ma’am, is that your husband?”
“Yes” says the woman.
“Did you hit him with that golf club?”
“Yes, yes, I did.” The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her hands on her face.
“How many times did you hit him?”
“I don’t know — put me down for a five.”
____ _______________________
A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between 2 trees he thought he could hit through. Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball hit a tree, bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.
As he approached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter asked, “Are you a good golfer?”
The man replied: “Got here in two, didn’t I?
___________________________
The bride was escorted down the aisle and when she reached the altar, the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.
She said: “What are your golf clubs doing here?”
He looked her right in the eye and said, “This isn’t going to take all day, is it?”
Golf in Kuwait
By Megan McGlynn and Mark Hardeman
from 2003
In the fairway
I thought I would let anyone out there who is contemplating a golf vacation this winter in on the wonders of the Kuwaiti golf scene. Although often overlooked in many of the leading golf publications, Kuwait golf is alive and kicking. The golf courses here offer golfers a unique experience, and leave participants with tremendous stories to tell their fellow duffers. We chose to begin our golfing adventures in Kuwait at the Ahmadi Golf and Country Club which has hosted the prestigious Kuwaiti Open 3 of the last 4 years. The highlights of the Kuwaiti golf experience can be outlined in the following categories.
6th hole at White Spruce Park in winter
One of the advantages of disc golf over regular golf is that you can play in the winter time. I did a blog post about disc golf when we were there in the fall.
Last weekend we went out and played 9 holes at White Spruce Park in Brampton.
Saturday was a calm day, wind-wise, and it was perfect for a walk in the woods.
9th hole at White Spruce Park in winter
Playing disc golf in the winter in one way is a little more difficult due to the bulkier clothes and heavy boots, and it’s definitely a good workout trudging up and down the hills in the snow. Just be sure to dress warm.
In another way it’s a little easier in that the trees have lost their leaves, so it’s a little more open and easier to see your targets and discs, although we almost lost one disc in the snow, but found it after about 10 minutes of looking (phew).
9th hole at White Spruce Park in winter
Last winter we didn’t get to disc golf because the park was so damaged from the ice storm. The winter before we went out a few times, and actually used discs as sleds to go down one of the steep hills (it was a little bit of a rough ride).
Hopefully we can get out and play a few more times this winter.
Osprey Valley (Heathlands)
Review by Drew Sinden
(originally submitted in 2003)
I have played this traditional links style course 5 times and every time I go I like it more and more. This is the closest course I have seen in Ontario to what I experienced in Scotland.
Since I last played there, they have added 36 more holes, and to everyone’s account that I have spoken to, they are as impressive as the original 18. I plan to try them out this summer.
You start out on the actual third hole since the site for the clubhouse had not been erected. This starting point is closest in proximity to the parking lot and drive shed; I haven’t yet heard whether they have developed something more permanent for their 19th hole. A gentle dog-let opening par 4 calling for a well-placed tee shot of about 235 yards, a water ditch down the left and a row of bunkers right call for accuracy, not length. The narrow green sits above you and is guarded by mounds. Miss right and you could be in big trouble.
The School of Golf is back with a new curriculum for 2015. Here is a tip from last night’s episode that deals with what your hips and shoulders should be doing when you turn back and forward swings.
In my opinion, the most important part is the shifting of the hips to start the downswing.
#StopDropAndMakeA12Foota is a rap song/video by 11-year-old @md_18undapar and is going to become the signature catchphrase (or at least a variation of it) for anyone who makes a putt over 10 feet.
I can’t wait until I knock in a 35-footer and can yell out “Stop, drop, I made a 35 footer!”
Recreation Golf Injuries
By Gregory C Berlet MD, FRCS(C) Orthopedic Surgery
While golf is not typically a contact sport injuries do occur. Surveys have found that up to one-third of golfers have experienced some kind of injury while playing the game. For most golfers, the majority of injuries come from technical deficiencies in their swings that put some kind of stress or strain on part of the elbow, wrist, shoulder, or back where it doesn’t belong. How much experience we have on the golf course tends to determine the type of golf injury we’re most likely to experience. Pro golfers more often suffer from muscle and joint overuse. Injuries to recreational golfers, however, are more likely to come from two sources: poor swing mechanics and lack of physical preparation. This column will examine many common golf sport injuries. We will review current scientific data and provide prevention programs and treatment strategies.
A period of warm-up is accepted as the price of participation in many sports (eg. Tennis). Unfortunately golfers often arrive at the course just in time to drive the ball down the first fairway. Before going out on the course, everyone should do about 15 minutes of exercises that will stretch the muscles of their hands, wrists, shoulders, back, and pelvis.